art by Elena CV.

Women are doomed.

That's what the studies show, apparently.

But then, maybe not, according to Bonnie Fuller who disputes the studies with some down-home perspective on the difference between traditional expectations 50 years ago and now.

Maureen Dowd of the NYTimes weighs in as well--but with a more accepting appraisal.

As Bonnie points out, "No, they were not a happy crowd back then. My mother told me that the secret no one wanted to talk about in the supposedly idyllic world of 60's suburban housewives--they were bored out of their frigging minds." The social expectations placed upon women 50 years ago were a product of almost an entirely different world. Today, women have choices, responsibility, and nearly unlimited access to everything a man could want (and more in some situations).

But then, while choices for women have opened up considerably in modern times, they are faced with more dire psychological burdens from society. Bonnie illustrates that standards of beauty have opened up, but I don't agree. Michelle Obama is careful not to show a wrinkle or gray hair to the public. Now more than ever, women are reminded of the power they have in beauty, and with youth being a partner to beauty except for the genetically favored few, women have much more to worry about. Besides, look how diligent we are in displaying our most genetically blessed women in full view of even the most Luddite viewers.

The plastic surgery business is booming, and while young girl boob-jobs might be a good percentage of the work out there--I would lay odds that the bulk of the market is in youth enhancement surgery. There's even a dark comedy TV show about it. People don't like having their bodies cut into, but for the appearance of youth, it's worth it. Go and ask almost any standard woman over 40 in America, and ask what they want most in life (it ain't plastic surgery).

So what's the sadness from? Many get good mileage out of blaming society and an over-eager marketplace for female woes. But even when you take away the images of the latest 18-year-old sex magnet, and the multi-billion dollar youth products industry, what do we have? We have a group of people who are better informed about their bodies and arguably even more acutely aware of the 'ticking clock' than they were a half century ago. Science and research these days is really good at telling us what is happening to our bodies, even while we can't do a damn thing about it. And regardless of whether or not children play into the mix--hormones, menopause, and loss of looks in general are a terrible thing for anyone to go through in such a short span of years. It's just that outward beauty is the easiest to manage of that growing list of aging side-effects.

There's another side to this discussion, though.

It takes a herculean effort to find happiness when the definition of ourselves is slowly stolen away by age. In reality, many men would crumble under the weight of a similar experience. But it's important to realize that happiness isn't meant to be a passive emotion. Happiness takes work--including, for most of us, the process to find what makes us happy.

Thought: Perhaps women are more prone to doing things that don't necessarily contribute to their own happiness?

Eve Ensler makes a great point about happiness in the video below, "Give away what you want the most."

Definitely worth thinking about.

Watch: